__________disappointment

im so disappointed with myself. i disappointed [you]. sorrie. i could have done better. i have to work on it. very hard. have to buck up mans.

in the com lab now, having com studies. bored. carn wait fer trng.

wanted to blog abt smth. but i cant rmbr wat. damn. *slaps head* oh yeah. abt PESS this sunday. i got the paper for the teams in the morning. was surprised that steph passed the paper to me. she usually doesnt. when i took the paper, the first thing that caught my eye was the pink highlighted word(s) "shirin/rachel".. hmmm capt and v-capt. surprised, i looked down further. glimpsed through my teammates names. smthg wasnt right. then, i saw smth. the word that made the difference. "tkgs b2". was totally shocked. dint expect it at all. was pretty sad. to add on to that, [you] dint cme to sch. haish. started to sms in class. smsed [you] and noraidah. i had to noe why i was in tkgs b2. she only replied me at 9 last nite. she said this. "i've discussed with ching yi. we need you there cuz u can cover as both GA and WA. it'll be a challenge for you too as you'll help to lead the team. we see you capable of handling the position. and u showed some positive change last trng. so take the challenge rach. (=" that got me thinking. daryl asked me to make the best out of everything. oh wells.

then this morning after PE, miss tan spoke to me. she said that if jodd and hafizah could play, both of them would be in my team. i guess, that made me feel better. and after all, [you] came too. that made the difference. im reallie gna miss playing in PESS with the c div. *sigh*


[you]'ve trng today too. i shall watch [you], like i always do. hopefully.


i noe i dont meet [your] standards. but i reallie want to be there for [you] everyday of [your] life. i love [you].